Monday, August 30, 2010

I wish...

Driving back home from Orcas Island last week, I found myself thinking out loud as I tried to make sense of certain conversations, observations and a writing exercise I participated in.

I listened as not one but two hitchhikers I picked up -- both seasonal workers at the hippie-ish Doe Bay Resort -- talked about their adventures moving from state to state and job to job in pursuit of their interests. I listened as a dozen or more aspiring writers at a Saturday workshop on memoir described people and places and experiences unknown to me. And I guess you could say I had a minor epiphany, which I voiced to Lori as we were pounding down I-5 toward home: I wish I had more time.

I don't mean it in any fatalistic kind of way. Rather, it's more a comment on how fast a day and a week can go by. No matter how efficient I might be, no matter what priorities I might set, I'm always running short on time. There are just so many things I want to do and experience, and even if I were awake 24/7 I still don't think I'd get around to everything.

Understand, I feel my blessed in so many ways. A long and loving marriage. Three healthy and happy adult children. An interesting career and job. Good health, good friends and the good fortune to own a condo and a getaway cabin. What more could a guy want? Call me selfish but...

I wish I had more time to spend outdoors. On a bike. On a hike. In the woods. On the water.

I wish I had more time to read. More novels. More non-fiction. More online and magazine articles.  More new authors.

I wish I had more time for play. Golf. Pool. Poker. Movies. Volleyball at the Y.

I wish I had more time to write. Beyond endless work e-mails, memos and editor's notes. Beyond these inadequate and increasingly rambling blog posts. A chance to really think and put into practice some of the concepts I've picked up at various workshops.


I wish I had more time with my wife. For day trips. For spontaneous outings. For snuggling and more.

I wish I had more time for friends. In person. Online. Doesn't matter as long as it's one-on-one and sincere.

I wish I had more time for myself. To grow new multimedia skills. To connect the dots in my life. To break out of my calm, conservative, cautious persona a little more frequently.


And, boy, do I wish I were more eloquent. Words can be so powerful and yet sometimes so inadequate.

Image: http://photobucket.com/images/stars/

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