"You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids." -- Derrick, 8
About 15 years ago, The Oregonian debuted a humor column called "The Edge." A daily compendium of wacky, irreverent and often juvenile (i.e., bathroom) humor, it was created and written for the first several years by Tim Harrower -- and quickly became a reader favorite with recurring features like Useless Fact o' the Day and Lame Joke du Jour.
Authorship of the column has changed hands a few times since, and its visibility in the newspaper has been taken down a notch, from the cover of the features section to an inside or back page. To tell the truth, I miss it most days. Today I'm glad I ran across it. After sharing my thoughts recently on the keys to a long marriage, The Edge offers a column's worth of wisdom, courtesy of kids 7 to 10 years old.
Along with the above, check out these nuggets:
How do you decide who to marry?
"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming." -- Alan, 10
"No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with." -- Kristen, 10
What is the right age to get married?
"Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then." -- Camille, 10
What do you think your mom and dad have in common?
"Both don't want any more kids." -- Lori, 8
What do most people do on a date?
"Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough." -- Lynnette, 8
"On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." -- Martin, 10
When is it OK to kiss someone?
"When they're rich." -- Pam, 7
"The law says you have to be 18, so I wouldn't want to mess with that." -- Curt, 7
"The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do." -- Howard, 8
Is it better to be single or married?
"It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them." -- Anita, 9
How would the world be different if people didn't get married?
"There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?" -- Kelvin, 8
How would you make a marriage work?
"Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck." -- Ricky, 10
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