Big brother, big sister

Readers of this blog probably have noticed a disproportionate number of posts about our youngest son, Jordan. It's true. When you pack as much into a single year as he did -- join the Army, get engaged, get married, train at two military bases in Georgia and Texas -- it's hard to not take notice.

So here's a shout-out to our two older kids, Nathan, 29, and Simone, 26. It begins with this anecdote...

A co-worker mentioned to me recently that she and her husband had a great time with their daughter at the Children's Museum, and she described the look of delight on her little girl's face at seeing her parents enjoying each other's company as well as being with her. We took our kids to the Children's Museum, too, when they were younger, so I could easily imagine how happy my colleague felt in that kid-centric place, with a make-believe grocery store and restaurant, firefighters' gear, etc.

But it also prompted me to tell my colleague that as much as I enjoyed those years when our kids were younger, I really love having three adult children and feel especially fortunate to have the two older ones living in the same city as us. It's particularly satisfying to see how strong a relationship Nathan and Simone have. They hang out together frequently and, perhaps inevitably, have overlapping circles of friends and acquaintances. My conversations with both are richer, deeper, and more like friend-to-friend rather than a stodgy parent-to-child dynamic. We long ago crossed the thresholds of having a beer or bottle of wine together, of telling randy jokes, of discussing romantic interests.

A couple of specifics come to mind in defining the kind of relationship I'm proud to have with them:

A week ago Monday, Simone treated me to dinner at a nice restaurant -- a belated gift for my late December birthday. In addition to sharing a sense of adventure when it comes to food (we tried sweetbreads for the first time and loved them), we could talk at length about her plans for graduate school and how Lori and I have adjusted to life in our new neighborhood. I know Simone and her partner, Kyndall, will pick up and leave this fall for the East Coast or possibly Pennsylvania, depending on where she winds up pursuing a masters in public policy. But, just as I feel happy for Jordan gaining valuable life experience with his multiple moves, I know the cross country move will test and shape Simone in ways neither she nor we can foresee.

A few days earlier, Nathan came over for dinner with his roommate, Jared. Both are DJs and doormen at Holocene, a popular nightclub that plays live and recorded music. We ate heartily, talked incessantly and laughed our heads off at some of their stories. Later that week, Nathan asked me for help editing his cover letter and resume as he seeks to gain a more secure foothold. In addition to his evening and weekend gigs, he works in a temporary data entry job for the state. Nathan didn't always seek out the constructive criticism I had to offer, so it means more that he asks for it now. He's going to be on my bowling team for an annual charity fundraiser and we're going to catch a Blazers game together as soon as our schedules mesh.

Maybe none of the preceding sounds special. What parent doesn't savor one-on-one time with his children? All I'm saying is that I'm blessed, doubly blessed, to have our two older kids living just a few miles away from us -- and triply blessed that we share common views and values when it comes to politics, religion, popular culture, the arts and personal responsibility.

Photo, above: At Nathan's college graduation, June 2009. Below, the two amigos in Mitla, Mexico, southeast of Oaxaca, February 2006.